Outrage transformed into fundraising shows my people have their penis priorities right.
You know, I always think I’m gonna stay on top of the blogging and penis news updates when I’m traveling, but that so rarely happens. As I’m sure the next post down will tell you, I was in Tampa/St. Petersburg this past week, and Chicago the week before that. If you are in one of those places and didn’t know I was there and we didn’t get to meet up: what the hell, man? Subscribe to my personal newsletter so you’ll know better next time.
My point being that lots of stories slip through the cracks and don’t get bookmarked for me to write about later, but I’ll be damned if this one gets away:
Norway Vows To Catch The Jerk Who Chopped Off Its ‘Penis Rock’
Now. That’s a little misleading, but the general gist of it is right. It was discovered last week that a moderately famous tourist destination in Eigersund, Norway had been vandalized, causing a large, phallic-looking rock outcropping to break off. It’s pretty clear based on the video here that this was deliberate and that people brought tools with them to break a big rock that looked like a dick.
Here’s the before and after:
What’s great about an otherwise “oh, that’s unfortunate. What else happened today?” story, is that Norwegians are having literally none of this. In the space of a few days, a crowdfunding site had raised approximately $20,000 USD in order to repair the structure, and the Eigersund police chief has opened an investigation that aims to prosecute the offenders with up to six years in prison.
You don’t fuck with Norway’s penises, you guys. Even rock ones.
I couldn’t be more proud of my people today, and I can’t wait to update this post once the repairs have been completed. I’m not totally sure why Huffington needed to drop this story into the “weird news” category. But I guess not everyone has my reverence for wang.
-t
PS – for the keen-eyed (there’s always one or two of you) that IS a Mapplethorpe penis in that header illustration. The original photograph is not on display right now, but you can see other Mapplethorpe cocks and read about their history at Artsy.
Tyler Dårlig Ulv (@tylerthebadwolf)
?? For all the comedy stereotypes, Norwegians are serious about the important things: https://t.co/5bfsr2JZno ??
Tyler Dårlig Ulv (@tylerthebadwolf)
Vandals broke what loosely translates as “troll penis rock” in Norway. Norwegians raised 20+ grand to fix it. https://t.co/5bfsr2JZno
Sigistrix
Norway is a strange land. They produced Black Metal (which I find unlistenable) and, somehow, Gaahl (who I find supremely sexy). This is hilarious, but totally in keeping with how Norway…just…is. What amazes me, is that I am fascinated by things metal and Viking and geology, and I just, inexplicably, managed to somehow miss this, the culmination everything about Norway I’m interested in.
tylerthebadwolf
Lol. Glad I could help. My people are good people.
-t